WARNING!!! Serious rant will follow, not for the weak of heart or easily offended
Letter to the jackass idiots at Best Buy... Hi, I'm an irate customer of yours...you know, the one who has been in the store TWICE and on the phone with you regarding her dead laptop. Yeah, you know, the one who had to get help to diagnose her computer's problem, the one you couldn't wouldn't aren't smart enough to help out. Yeah, you know me...you told me first on the phone to bring my machine in and the geek squad could run diagnostics...yeah, NOT SO MUCH...that "isn't covered under standard warrenty"...I needed to figure out the problem so that they could "act as the shipping agent later and send to Acer". So I called my brother in law, thank GOD for him. He figured out it was the mother board. Toast, fried...not gonna work, need to have Acer deal with it. Great, so at least I know what the hell is going on. I think, ok...time to go back to Best Buy and have the Geek Squad ship it out...$35 bucks to have them ship it for me(never mentioned to the first geek I talked to), but if I call Acer they'll just drop ship a box to my door. The closest service center is in San Jose. Oh yeah, and did I mention it took the idiot 10 minutes to find the freaking phone number for Acer?!
Ok, fine, I"ll save myself some cash and call Acer to get the box. Ship it myself I think. Uh huh, I call Acer today....Roger answers my call. Roger listens patiently to my story and then tells me that I need to take it to the closest Best Buy as they are a service center for Acer. WTF?! I then literally go off on Roger and tell him the story above. He apologizes and says well, maybe you want to call Best Buy first.
Hrmff....I call Best Buy and as nicely as I can through gritted teeth I tell the young lady that answered the phone the story and what I need is for her to connect me to a person who can help me. Basically if she has the ablity to read between the lines she should have heard, "crazy lady is really pissed off, get help stat!!!" But she didn't. She had the nerve to tell me the person I needed was busy and I should call back. I said I needed him to call me back as I was a teacher and on my lunch break and I had only 20 minutes left of it. She said she'd "make sure he understood that". Yeah, right.....15 minutes later and here I am...no freaking phone call. I'm annoyed BEYOND all belief. Good thing my amazing student teacher is teaching today. I actually think steam is coming out of my ears.
I'm off to call a different Best Buy. Screw Mr. Asshole for not calling me back.
It's Monday...I loveloathe Mondays. I'm not sure what it is...maybe it's just the getting back into the grind of things and not being able to sit and drink coffee for a couple hours. Or maybe it could be 27 third graders looking to me for guidance. I don't know, I just know I really hate Mondays. I always feel sluggish and tired. I have a hard time remembering my routine and when I arrive at work I discover a load of crap I forgot that I needed to do and then feel overwhelmed for the week. It's not that I am feeling overwhelmed today, because believe me, I'm NOT. I have the world's best student teacher who has everything under control.
Yet I am in a “mood” this morning. A sort of funk. It doesn't help that I'm sitting next to a sweet cherub who is taking the Oregon State Math Assessment for the second time. Poor girl is trying so hard, but doesn't understand the concepts at hand. I just want so badly to tell her the right answer, but that could mean me losing my teaching license. NOT a good idea and definitely NOT worth it.
Could my mood be due to the fact that I got more bad news regarding my laptop? Maybe I'm going through the stages of grief. I found out yesterday that it's NOT what we thought the problem was. My “personal geek”, Arron is now thinking that the mother board is toast. WHY ME?! I must cry. I went to Best Buy last night to let them ship it to Acer and have them deal with it, but upon my 7:25 arrival I discovered that they were CLOSED. Ok, who closes as 7pm? Give me a break...I guess I though the standard Sunday closing time was like 8pm. Whatever. Today I shall go after work and present them with the substandard piece of electronics I purchased from them. Then I'll be waiting a month on pins and needles wondering if my baby will be returned to me whole once again or a broken piece that I will be stuck with....wish me luck and please feel free to send cards...with cash...cuz right now I say SCREW Microsoft Vista and Acer and BRING on an Apple!!!!
On an up side, today I get to teach kinder club here at school. The flu has gotten a couple people at school and I am the lucky girl who is available. So...bring on the cute little kindergarteners, I can do ANYTHING for an hour. We'll be singing and dancing and reading wonderful literature. Probably some coloring and snack time too. Wish me luck and bring on the fun!!!
Dear Computer Gods, I want you to know that I'm trying to be patient. Really, I am. And I want you to know that I am thankful for the technologically gifted people you have connected me with in life...specifically my wonderful brother in law, Arron. I'm easpecially thankful that you helped me keep my cool at Best Buy tonight as the Geek Squad guy told me he could basically do NOTHING to help me, unless I had $59 bucks. You helped me be calm and talk nicely and then call Arron. Thank you for given Arron the ability to run the diagnostics on my baby for FREE.
I want to ask you a little favor....please...cure my girl, let her be ok. AND FAST. Like, I don't wanna have to wrap her in a cold box and send her to wherever Acer is. She'll be all alone and oh so scared. And she really doesn't wanna be away from me for a month either. Please let her be ok. Let Arron make her all better.
I'm hoping you've noticed how patient I've been through this whole ordeal. I mean, really...you let some teenage punk break into my home and steal my first baby and then this...I've been patient. I didn't get pissed at my hubby and have even tried to be nice too. I didn't even get angry at the Geek Squad guy for not being helpful in the least bit.
You must also notice that I have INCREDIBLY less time to spend in the internet world. I mean, by now I must have at least 1,000 blog posts to read on my Google Reader. And just think of all the e-mail I'm behind on. I really need my baby back...and SOON.
So, if there are computer gods out there, please let them send a working laptop with wireless capabilties.
Ok, so I'm not sure exactly what that title even means, but it sums up (in nice words) my current frustration...my laptop (which is barely 6 months old, which I had to buy because my laptop was STOLEN from my home...yes, we were burglarized in October...which is a topic for my blog on another day) POOPED OUT LAST NIGHT! OMG! OMG! OMG! If I didn't have my darling hubby's machine to use I'd be going insane.
I know it'd be UGLY.
Ugly like that lady screaming. I'm already screaming inside. My hubby's machine just isn't like my machine. He hates AOL so now I can't even IM my good friend Liane. And let's not even start to talk about all the amazing bookmarks on MY machine. If there is a computer god out there, please save my little girl. Ok, now I have gone a bit far. I know it's my fault for not backing up my stuff, but this isn't supposed to happen to me. I'm a nice gal, just minding my own business and all.
So yesterday I was updating my i tunes, and having a problem with the downloads. I tunes usually manages to screw with the router, forcing me to walk ALL the way upstairs to flip the switch and then go back downstairs to try again. After doing this a couple times yesterday I decided to just cord my laptop to the router so I wouldn't have to use the wireless signal. Well, hubby decided to help too, cuz I guess one of the video podcasts was crashing the router even corded up. After he got that all fixed he decided to be helpful and run a disk clean up...and that's when it happened...black screen...unable to boot it even in safe mode...life looks bleak for my girl.
Thankfully we have a brother in law who is a techie nerd. We dialed him up and he said he'd research it and call back in an hour. It's almost 24 hours later....SOS...I need help...hubbie is having cocktails with his new manager (go baby go, work that corporate ladder), the short person is with grandma (gotta love grammy who takes her every monday), and I'm sitting here blogging about my distress when I really should make something to eat and get some reading done for class.
Speaking of class, I'm reading Ellin Keene's new book, To Understand. Amazing is all I have to say. Wow!! Must read is all I have to say. If your child's teacher isn't reading it, give it to him/her as a gift!!! And I'm off now to go get my "teacher geek" on (read a professional book and then blather on about it to my hubby later).
If you have any ideas on my laptop, I'd love to hear 'em. And if you want to give me a laptop, I'd love to hear that too...especially if it's the mac air book :)
Ok, so I had a burrito with pinto beans for lunch and garlic chicken pizza for dinner....need I say more? Thus the subject of my blog tonight. I have what HAS to be the world's WORST gas EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's scary when even you shock yourself, not to mention your family. So, as I thought about it I started to wonder and ask questions, like any life long learner does....right?! I started to wonder about flatulence and what it is. So I went to Wikipedia, where else does one go? This is what I discovered:
Flatus is expelled under pressure through the anus, whereby, as a result of the voluntary or involuntary relaxation of the anal sphincter, the rapid evacuation of gases from the lower intestine occurs. Essentially this happens when the flatus pressure inside the rectum exceeds the anal sphincter's ability to restrain it. Depending upon the relative state of the sphincter (relaxed/tense) and the positions of the buttocks, this often results in a crackling or trumpeting sound, but gas can also be passed quietly. The olfactory components of flatulence include skatole, indole, and sulfurous compounds.[1] The non-odorous gases are mainly nitrogen (ingested), carbon dioxide (produced by aerobic microbes or ingested), and hydrogen (produced by some microbes), as well as lesser amounts of oxygen (ingested) and methane (produced by anaerobic microbes).[2]
My favorite part is where it talks about the sound factor...the "trumpeting sound" line completely cracked me up! I would categorize my gas tonight as a trumpet...yes, it's that bad!
So I read on in Wikipedia and learned this: As a normal body function, the action of flatulence is an important signal of normal bowel activity and hence is often documented by nursing staff following surgical or other treatment of patients. However, symptoms of excessive flatulence can indicate the presence of irritable bowel syndrome or some other organic disease. In particular, the sudden occurrence of excessive flatulence together with the onset of new symptoms provide reason for seeking further medical examination. Flatulence is not poisonous; it is a natural component of various intestinal contents. However, discomfort may develop from the build-up of gas pressure. In theory, pathological distension of the bowel, leading to constipation, could result if a person holds in flatulence. Not all flatus is released from the body via the anus. When the partial pressure of any gas component of the intestinal lumen is higher than its partial pressure in the blood, that component enters into the bloodstream of the intestinal wall by the process of diffusion. As the blood passes through the lungs this gas can diffuse back out of the blood and be exhaled. If a person holds in flatus during daytime, it will often be released during sleep when the body is relaxed. Some flatus can become trapped within the feces during its compaction and will exit the body, still contained within the fecal matter, during the process of defecation
I'm glad to know that it's actually a healthy thing. So, all I have to say is FART ON PEOPLE, let the gas goooooooooooooooooooo.
So I just kept reading on and found this: In many cultures, human flatulence in public is regarded as embarrassing and repulsive, even to the point of being a taboo subject. People will often strain to hold in the passing of gas when in polite company, or position themselves to conceal the noise and smell. In other cultures it may be no more embarrassing than coughing. It is even a sign of happiness in some cultures. While the act of passing flatus is generally considered to be an unfortunate occurrence in public settings, flatulence may, in casual circumstances, be used as either a humorous supplement to a joke, or as a comic activity in and of itself. I wanna live in the culture where gas is a sign of happiness....anyone know where I can find that? If you do, please post it in my comments. I may just have to take a vacation there.
On another note, I'm watching Biggest Loser. Talk about AMAZING! I'm currently participating in the biggest loser at my school. We weigh in each Thursday. Last Thursday I lost 3 pounds. Wish me luck in the down direction...one more day to weigh in. (I'm following the Weight Watchers Flex Points Plan)
That's all....or maybe not....I MUST leave you with this video which contains a product that my husband and daughter would LOVE for me to have about now:
tee heee.....and if that wasn't enough....I have to throw this one in too:
I was reading Hey Lady! Whatcha Readin’? and she had this list of things she can't remember. Here is the scoop: Andilit has a wonderful blog. In a recent post she talked about the book Old Friend from Far Away by Natalie Goldberg. Goldberg is a writing teacher, and this book is about how to write memoir. She states that first we must know how to remember, a skill I need to develop as my memory is as hole-y as swiss cheese. She gives exercises and writing prompts on how to discover forgotten memories. One such prompt is to write for 10 minutes about what you don’t remember. (that's straight from trish's blog)
AND in the fun flavor of the blogging world, I shall make my very first tags: Liane, Jen, Tanya, Jane You're all tagged and I FULLY expect you to make a list of things you can't remember and post em. Oh, and do it for 10 minutes.
So...here is my list: 1. I can't remember who my third grade teacher was. I wonder if it was a really traumatic year or what, but I just cannot remember anything about that year.
2. I can't remember my husband's cell phone number to save my life. OK, what am I saying? I can't remember ANY phone numbers....they're just all in my cell phone and I just click on their names. I swear I'm gonna end up with Alzheimer's.
3. I can't remember what my grandma smelled like. She was such an important person in my life, in shaping who I am and I can't remember her smell.
4. I can't remember my first lie....I wonder if it was a good one.
5. I can't remember what last happened in the book I'm reading currently.
6. I can't remember who first told me about Dansko shoes....I love them soooooooo. I do remember my twinny bought me my first Dansko's....and I still wear 'em.
7. I can't remember what my first alcohol shot was...I remember lots of shots I did in college, but cannot recall what was first. (maybe it's because I drank soooooooo much back then, jeeze I hope my poor mother isn't reading this)
8. I can't remember what happened and why I finally moved outta the dorms in college....maybe tanya will remember and fill me in.
9. I can't remember why I thought I needed a Jeep Wrangler when I lived at the beach. God knows it was fun driving topless and on the beach, but man did I lose a ton of money on that "investment".
10. I can't remember when I got my period. Ok, I can't even remember when I had my period last....like when the nurse asked me on Tuesday, when was your last cycle and when did it start and end? Schaaaaaaa, like I remember that. I just gave up and picked a random date off the (so conveniently) provided calendar.
11. I can't remember the last time my dad remembered my birthday. I kinda don't even remember ever getting a card from him on my birthday.....maybe my twinny can help fill in that gap.
So I am convinced that I may already have early onset Alzheimer's or a brain tumor. My friend Liane just says I've got too much on my plate. Maybe so, but maybe I need a brain scan or lobotomy or something like that. Have a good (not much left of it) day and hold on tight, cuz tomorrow is HAIKU FRIDAY!!!!
My name is Janelle and it's been two days since I blogged.
There I said it.
I honestly mean to blog something but nothing is coming to me. At least nothing I wanna or feel like sharing. So I shall just ramble.
Today was my annual exam. It was fine. My doctor is pregnant. I meant to ask her who her baby doctor is but I forgot....oh well. So when you're a baby doctor like WHO do you see and HOW do you choose?
My short person is making bedtime hell lately. Anyone have any tips on how to keep her IN BED for more than 2 minutes? It's almost 9pm and she's still awake (we put her down around 7:30-8. She comes up with plethora of reasons she "needs" us: *I'm scared
*I need a drink
*I want my princess net down
*My tummy hurts
*I need another hug and kiss
It's like endless....I'm seriously soooooooooo fed up that the last trip I made (5 min. ago) I threatened to take away her night lights (yes, she has TWO of them) and close her door if I hear even ONE MORE SOUND. Dear God, it's a calgon night.....no wonder we have only one. I can't imagaine have 2 or 3 or 6 of them doing this. Like, Kate (from Kate and Jon Plus 8, or whatever). How the HELL does she do it? I'd slit my wrists, honestly I would!
My student teacher (the BEST student teacher in the entire world) is currently doing her solo teaching....which means I'm officially kicked outta my room. It's been interesting. At first I was like, yah, this will be a blast. But now it's like I have a new job that consists of finding work to keep me busy outta my our classroom. I've been busy working with students who didn't pass the Oregon State Assessment (thanks a lot George W. Bush for NCLB). What a waste of time and resources we spend testing and retesting kids. It kinda pisses me off. Don't get me wrong...I don't mind taking them to do the test again, I don't. It's just so stupid. Why are we taking these kids out of class to make them take a test that takes 2 to 4 hours of their learning time away? Seems so dumb....BUT, if our school doesn't have a high enough percentage of kids that pass the test it puts us in jeopardy of not making AYP. Uck....I should stop now or this will turn into a full on rant.
So I think I'll just leave on that note. I'm going to get in bed and read for a bit.
This is from the inside of the Performing Arts Center.
Then finally headed home and we were able to end the day with some sunny weather. Isn't the Willamette River pretty?
The best pics are of my students making silly faces, but I doubt their parents would be thrilled at the idea of my posting here faces on my blog. So....there you have my weekly winners.
It's Haiku Friday my friends. Please go visit Playgroups are No Place for Children and spread some blogger love! So I feel the need to preface my haiku today with some background. So I had my annual exam scheduled for 3:30 today. Yeah, you know the fun annual exam that ONLY ladies get to have. I continue to go to my gynecologist that delivered the short person. I was told that when I made the appointment (I mean had to reschedule the appointment) that this was her "on call" day. Ok, fine I thought...I'll play mess with destiny. I actually remembered to call ahead to see that she hadn't been called out to a delivery. Nope, she was still there, so I left work early and headed to my excitingfun pain in the ass appointment, only to arrive and discover that my truly wonderful doctor had been called out. To make things even more painful the ladies at the desk had to add that it hadn't been even more than 5 minutes since she'd left. Dammit, dammit, dammit. (no wonder the short person likes that word). I did get to visit with my favorite nurse while there (hi if you're reading my blog and leave me a comment) which made the whole trip worth it. (even though I'll see her again on Tuesday)
I'd composed my haiku (during my drive to the appointment at stoplights) only to arrive and find the content of my haiku blown. So, I'm sticking with my original haiku...god knows I've had enough of these exams and the experience is the same year after year and it's been seared into my memory. The doctor's voice is italicized.
fun for me today gynecologist visit annual exam
forgot to shave legs hairy armpits to see too I'm such a loser
"hi, how have you been?" "great" "how is your little girl?" "fine, three and sassy"
small talk is over moving on to the fun part only yearly....thanks
"lay on the table put your feet in the stirrups" insert speculum
it was nice and warm my very thoughtful doctor then came the pinch, ow!
breast exam was next "felt anything abnormal?" I reply with no
"done, any questions?" "no, not really"....."till next year?" "can't wait to see you"
Ok, that's it...hopefully I didn't repulse the weak of heart. I am looking forward to Tuesday and will consider it my "second chance" to shave the legs and pits :)
In honor of my good friend Liane's birthday, my blog post today shall be devoted to her. She got all snarky about my post yesterday...I guess a pregnant man just didn't do it for her. She said, "post a pic of your short person"....I wanted to reply to her with fack off or something else equally nasty, but I couldn't...at least not on her BIRTHDAY! So a pic for Liane's birthday and a little limerick for her.
There once were a couple of gals
They were the greatest of pals
Until one criticized the other's blog,
she must have been in some sort of fog.
For after it an apology to give, she shall.
Ta da! I'm such a great good wanna be poet :)
So here is a limerick I found online...it's what I'd like to do after a rough day in my classroom.
There once was a lady in the staffroom
who found a long and thin broom
she waved it about
with a scream and a shout
and cleaned up the whole of her classroom.
I think I should quit now, huh? This is really going nowhere at this point. So I leave you with this reminder....tomorrow is
and my student teacher is doing her solo teaching right now....I think I'll have some time to work on something REALLY good....
So I am stuck using my hubby's puter cuz mine screwed with the router and I had to walk all the way upstairs to reset it and don't feel like going back downstairs to turn my laptop back on. My point in telling you this? 1. I'm lazy tired. Oh ok, a bit of both! 2. It was a long day. 3. I wasn't gonna blog...I even shut down my laptop. 4. I couldn't not blog..... 5. I needed a segue into how I ever found out about a pregnant man. At any rate, when I had to go to the comcast home page to get my e-mail, and I see a headline about a pregnant man. If you know me at all, you know I HAVE to be in on the latest...(gossip that is) so of course I clicked on the video clip....yup, a pregnant man and he'll be on Oprah tomorrow (Thursday). I'm so upset completely pissed off that I have class tomorrow after school and there is like NO way I'll be able to get home to see it! Maybe there is some sweet soul that will make a tape or dvd of the show for me. PLEASE?!
I'm going to bed. I'm wiped. I will probably dream about crazy shit tonight now that I've seen this so close to sleepy time.
OMG I'm soooo tired (remember, I had a field trip today)....I considered not blogging today. Then I considered doing an April Fool on you. Then I spent 90 minutes reading blogs and decided since it was no longer April Fool's Day on the east coast I couldn't do an April Fool....so....I was left with this: Lisammdid a funny meme (ok, what the hell is a meme?!, she said she got the "meme" from another blog) on her blog, so I lifted it from her. It’s fun, try it! 1. Your Rock Star name (first pet, current car): Pumpkin Sonata 2. Your Gangsta name (fave ice cream flavor, fave type of shoe): Peanut Butter Chocolate Dansko 3. Your Native American name (favorite color, favorite animal): Red Princess (she is my kitty) 4. Your soap opera name (middle name, city where you were born): Diane Scotland 5. Your Star Wars name (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name): Dorja 6. Superhero name (2nd fave color, favorite drink): Purple Coffee 7. NASCAR name (the first names of your grandfathers): Frank Milton 8. Stripper name (the name of your favorite perfume/cologne/scent, favorite candy): Banana Republic M & M's 9. TV Weather Anchor Name (your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter): Quail Quebec 10. Spy Name (your favorite season/holiday, fave flower): Christmas Daffodil 11. Cartoon Name (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now): Banana Bra 12. Hippie Name (what you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree): Oatmeal Spruce
So there you have it. I think I'd now like to be known as Banana Bra. Thank you one, thank you all. Now I'm going to haul my tired arse to bed. I had to snooze the alarm 4 times today......tomorrow MUST be better!
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